Niceness Is a Cultural Virtue. Kindness Is a Divine One.
In much of Western evangelical culture, niceness has been elevated as the highest virtue—conflict-avoidance, politeness, and smiling submission to social expectations. But Jesus wasn’t nice. He was fiercely kind.
He is kind—deeply, relentlessly kind. Kindness means doing what is truly good for others, even when it costs something or creates discomfort.
1. Jesus Weeps, He Doesn’t Just Smile
John 11:35 – “Jesus wept.”
• At Lazarus’ tomb, Jesus doesn’t offer clichés or “nice” answers.
• He knows He’ll raise Lazarus—but He enters the grief first.
• Nice might say: “Don’t cry, everything will be okay.”
• Kindness weeps with those who weep.
2. Jesus Flips Tables to Defend the Vulnerable
Matthew 21:12–13 – Cleansing the Temple
• Jesus enters the Temple and flips the tables of those exploiting the poor.
• He causes a scene—not to shame, but to protect God’s house and the outsiders.
• Nice avoids confrontation.
• Kindness confronts injustice head-on.
3. Jesus Speaks Hard Truth to the Rich Young Ruler
Mark 10:21 – “Jesus looked at him and loved him…”
• Jesus tells him to give up his wealth—a hard, personal truth.
• He says it because He loves him, not to shame him.
• The man walks away sad—but Jesus doesn’t chase him to stay “nice.”
• Nice sugarcoats.
• Kindness tells the truth, even when it hurts.
4. Jesus Rebukes Peter—Firmly, But With Love
Matthew 16:23 – “Get behind me, Satan!”
• Peter tries to stop Jesus from going to the cross.
• Jesus rebukes him sharply—not to humiliate, but to correct.
• Nice would say nothing to avoid offending a friend.
• Kindness risks offense to guard someone’s soul.
5. Jesus Tells Martha to Reconsider Her Priorities
Luke 10:41–42 – “Martha, Martha, you are worried…”
• He gently calls her out for being busy instead of present.
• He doesn’t shame her, but He doesn’t let her stay stuck.
• Nice would let her feel self-righteous.
• Kindness invites her into peace.
6. Jesus Tells the Pharisees the Truth—Even When It Costs Him
Matthew 23 – “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees…”
• Jesus calls out hypocrisy publicly—not to humiliate, but to awaken.
Kindness shirks popularity, reputation, and safety
Nice is self conscious and preserves appearances
Kindness risks everything for love and truth