Avoiding the Narcissistic Mindset
“Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. “. 1Peter 3:9
When we allow pride and self-justification to control us, we begin to act like the accusers of Christ—justifying ourselves, blaming others, and avoiding suffering. Jesus, however, did not react in pride but trusted the Father, showing the way to overcome narcissistic tendencies.
The acrostics BASH and JAW help us recognize and reject behaviors that align with narcissistic tendencies, guiding us toward humility, repentance, and transformation in Christ.
BASH – What We Do Without Christ
These are the natural sinful reactions when we feel threatened or wronged. When operating in BASH mode, a person shifts blame, reacts with anger, shames others, or humiliates people (often through scoffing) to gain control.
B – Blame (Shifting responsibility to others instead of owning mistakes)
Genesis 3:12-13 – “The man said, ‘The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.’ Then the Lord God said to the woman, ‘What is this you have done?’ The woman said, ‘The serpent deceived me, and I ate.’”
A – Angered Response (Lashing out in rage instead of patient endurance)
James 1:19-20 – “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.”
S – Shame (Shaming others to control or degrade them instead of leading with grace)
John 8:3-5 – “The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, ‘Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now, what do you say?’”
John 8:10-11 – “Jesus straightened up and asked her, ‘Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?’ ‘No one, sir,’ she said. ‘Then neither do I condemn you,’ Jesus declared. ‘Go now and leave your life of sin.’”
H – Humiliate (Scoffing, mocking, or tearing others down to feel superior)
Proverbs 21:24 (NIV)
24The proud and arrogant man—“Mocker” is his name; he behaves with overweening pride.
Proverbs 22:10 (NIV)
10Drive out the mocker, and out goes strife; quarrels and insults are ended.
Proverbs 9:7-8 (NIV)
7“Whoever corrects a mocker invites insult; whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse.
8Do not rebuke a mocker or he will hate you; rebuke a wise man and he will love you.
Psalms 1:1 (NIV)
1Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked
or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers.
In His passion Jesus did not BASH others even when He was unjustly accused:
Isaiah 53:7 (NIV)
7He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth;
he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth.
JAW – The Stiff-Necked Narcissistic Mindset
These attitudes prevent repentance and cause individuals to act as if they are above others. JAW reflects a mindset that justifies itself, avoids suffering, and views weakness as failure, in contrast to Christ’s example of humility and strength through surrender.
J – Justifies Themselves (Always finding excuses instead of admitting fault)
Luke 18:9-14 – “To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: ’Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: “God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.” But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, “God, have mercy on me, a sinner.” I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.’”
A – Avoids Suffering (Seeking comfort over character growth)
Hebrews 12:11 – “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”
W – Weakness is Bad (Believing that power is in dominance instead of surrender)
2 Corinthians 12:9 – “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”
Jesus’ Example: The True Path to Strength
✅ Jesus did not justify Himself but let God do so.
1 Peter 2:23 – “When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.”
✅ He embraced suffering for a greater purpose.
Hebrews 5:8 – “Son though he was, he learned obedience from what he suffered.”
✅ He showed that weakness in the world’s eyes is strength in God’s kingdom.
2 Corinthians 12:10 – “That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
Praying through the elements in the acrostic’s BASH and JAW, we can recognize and repent from behaviors that lead to narcissistic tendencies and choose the way of Christ instead. Jesus demonstrated true strength through humility, endurance, and surrender to God. By rejecting blame, anger, shaming, scoffing, and humiliation, and by embracing suffering, admitting fault, and redefining strength through God’s wisdom, we walk the path of genuine repentance and transformation.